The Witness

2021.12.03 22:46 GigalithineButhulne The Witness

The full conference chamber was silent as the slow, ponderous sound of inevitability approached via the hallway outside. The documents had been prepared. The Fdaz Metallurgy Consortium had brokered a one-in-a-generation deal to mine one of the moons of a colony of the notoriously fearful, xenophobic Awsevaj for enough rare earths to supply equipment manufacturers in this sector of the galaxy for a generation. All that remained was the signing --- and the witnessing.
For an occasion like this, an enormous agreement with a people who rarely made agreements, no ordinary witness was procured, but rather, a Witness. One of the legendarily slow, enormous leviathans, whose memory was continuous for generations of most ordinary sapients and unlike every electronic and physical-media storage to date, untamperable. On occasion, Witnesses died of natural causes. In one famous incident that nearly caused a large-scale galactic war, a Witness was deliberately assassinated.
The Witness' slow, reverbrating footfalls came ever closer like the sound of history being made. The room had been silent for so long, waiting for the being's approach. The huge entryway's doors opened as the creature slowly, slowly moved through the doorway. Some of the officials in the room drew back as though the huge sapient might crush them, as though its slow movements could not easily be anticipated and avoided.
It was many times taller than already quite tall Hefz chairman of the Fdaz Consortium. Bipedal, bilaterally symmetrical, with two huge arms capable of carrying off small vehicles with passengers inside. In one hand it carried some sort of open container, and there was *steam* coming off the noxious-smelling liquid inside. The Witness plodded painfully slowly to the enormous throne prepared for it, and then slowly lowered itself, partly folding its body so that its two feet rested on the floor and its major joint on the platform.
Everyone knew that the Witnesses were a civilization in and of themselves. While it seemed like they had been part of galactic civilization forever, it was generally known that only a handful of their own reproductive generations had passed since they had emerged into galactic society at all. Their physical ponderousness and slowness of thought and reaction belied a shockingly rapid facility for learning and an astonishing creativity with the use of electronics to level the technological field. But the slowness of their lives and society, not to mention their sheer enormity, meant that the Witnesses could never truly be integrated into galactic society.
Instead, they served roles like these: watchers and rememberers, keepers of the long galactic consensus. It was rumoured that their own name for themselves translated to "children of fertile soil", but they came to be known as a species in the galaxy as the Witnesses.
The Witness spoke, in slow, deep, profound tones. Most species found the voice of a Witness to be both terrifying and beautiful. The resonance of the low tones could be felt in the flooring and the walls. Carefully trained translators for both the Fdaz Metallurgy Consortium and the Awsevaj Protection Circle, on special attention-increasing medication, translated it as "I am here to observe the agreement."
The Consortium Chairman lifted his front quarters. "Greetings to Witness Dangerous-Furred-Animal Connector-of-Garments. We have called you here to observe this agreement between the Fdaz Metallurgy Consortium and the Awsevaj Protection Circle for the mining of the Awsevaj colony moon Awhendalku. Have you been apprised of the terms?"
The interpreters, deep in their trance of slowness, rendered his words in tones nothing like those of the Witness itself, but were apparently understood.
Then the Witness responded, and there was another, much longer eternity of deep sound around all of the meeting participants, and it recited the major points of the agreement.
When it fell silent, the room remained quiet for a time, and then the Awsevaj First-to-Flee, in trembling tones, said, "We accept the terms. Inform the Witness." Then true to his title, he fled out of the room at the incredible speed only the Awsevaj were naturally capable of.
The Witness listened to the interpreters. Then slowly, the huge barrel of dangerously hot liquid was lifted to its upper orifice. The bystanders shuddered as a molten river poured down its vast gullet. Then the Witness replied, "I have observed the agreement to this contract. I will remember what you have agreed, down several of your generations. I and my kind shall remind your successors if they need reminding."
Then it paused for long minutes and began again.
"Please send the previously payment in Nofraljik Compute Credits to account 22-3235-92-28-54 in [low-frequency-tone-series-name-of-Witness-homeworld-location]. It has been a pleasure doing business with you. Have a very good [long diurnal cycle/year], and I hope to hear from you in the near [far] future."
A sum of currency the size of the total wealth of several Awsevaj Fright-Huddles was transferred in the background to the Witness' account. With that, the leviathan being rose upon its two legs, miraculously capable of keeping the huge creature balanced, and gradually plodded its way out of the chamber.
Leo Taylor made his way back to his small commuter transport ship. It was always easy money being a sort of glorified notary to the zippy little xenos. A sum worth about the cost of renovating his bathroom with a little leftover for vacation cruise tickets for himself and his wife had appeared in his bank account, or would be once he had traded away the compute credits to the Technological Development Authority for actual money. He had enough time to get to pick up his daughter from astrogation summer camp and get home before dinner. A pretty good day.
This is \technically* prompt-inspired as it is actually a response to my own writing prompt, "[Humans can charge high rates to act as private witnesses for treaties, business contracts, and other agreements among aliens.]("*
I'm the creator of /humansarespaceferrets as well as a moderator of /humansarespaceorcs. I also run a Discord server affiliated with both subreddits called The Airsphere (invite link).
--The gigalithine lenticular entity Buthulne.
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2021.12.03 22:46 OhSweetieNo That time when Derrick told it like it is (and Jill approved) 😋👌🏻

That time when Derrick told it like it is (and Jill approved) 😋👌🏻 submitted by OhSweetieNo to DuggarsSnark [link] [comments]

2021.12.03 22:46 epsilon11unit when will things go back to normal

View Poll
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2021.12.03 22:46 MinerDy Help the small posts

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2021.12.03 22:46 Retire_Happy Accountants Wanted!

Locations in Illinois, California, NY, and of course, Texas...The Texas State Comptroller is looking for tax auditors. New graduates and experienced candidates are welcome. Extensive three month training program on sales and use tax audits. We get you ready to hit the ground running on state tax law and audit processes! Great career ladder with major increases every step, excellent PTO, many state and federal holidays off, flexible schedule, remote work by experience, and incredible network of talented professionals. As an auditor, you will be the lead on your assignments and assignments are distributed based on experience level so there is plenty of room to grow in size of assignments and branching off to other corporate taxes. Start dates in January, March, and June.
Check out this job on Indeed: Texas Comptroller of Public Accounts Texas Comptroller - Tax Auditor - Chicago Downers Grove, IL 60515
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2021.12.03 22:46 Neat-Ferret-8847 RESHIRAM 2031 6812 9160

serious ppl only
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2021.12.03 22:46 Artist0491 What is something that you are eager to get done?

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2021.12.03 22:46 whiskeytacosfan Today's Goodwill find. That 7 wood feels amazing. Now if only my car hadn't broken down in the parking lot....

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2021.12.03 22:46 jlval87 Everyone talking about the "me too" movement when it's more like "me now too" movement

What I mean is if you were treated like a piece of human veal since the movement started, you are going to be supported non stop forever. However, what about the people before that? Kid Rock literally had a song in a 2001 kids movie talking about "I like 'em underage", Jerry Sandusky from like the 70s to 2000, and Jared Fogle with 15.6 TB.... averaging 100,000 hours per TB, that's 178 YEARS of child porn and that scares me the most. All this stuff happened when I was a kid.
If this all happened now, the that dealt with these issues would be glorified and an easy life becoming internet popular. I had a priest do questionable things, I had a openly gay adult try coming on to me, and a creepy old dude that worked customer service at the grocery store I worked at when I was 15-17. This dude would rest his hands on my lower back at work sometimes in a group convo or whatever. If I said anything back then, adults didn't care or want to be involved, so they ignored. If this happened yesterday, I'd be on national news talking about how "courageous" I am and "more people need to come forward like you" (though the national media are just exploding them for news and views).
Where's my "Me too back then" movement fame, money, and easy life? I just get kicked out of the military because some guy that sexually assaulted me gave me Ambien pills when drinking with him? No, no, no, I'm a white male.... I'm supposed to man up and stop being a pussy in school. If I'm shy, I'm a bitch... "Dude, you're a virgin, and you can't stop mumbling when I talked to girls"... Kids these days DONT know what the struggle was like being laughed at, bullied (but wasn't the traditional movie style bully), made fun of by friends, teachers making fun of me.... Me growing up, it wasn't the physical issues as much as the major mental health issue I've finally discovered at the age of 31... all these memories are from 14 to 21... The dude with the Ambien and me waking up with him big spooning me was stationed with me at the same base.
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2021.12.03 22:46 mindthemeasure Looking for someone to pick up and ship an item from IKEA Tempe

Hi there! I know this is an odd request. I am unable to locate two items at any IKEA on the east coast. However, I was able to find both at the Tempe location. I am hoping somebody could help me get these two items and ship them to me on the east coast. Unfortunately, IKEA will not ship or deliver at my distance.
It seems this could happen multiple ways. I can order the items and have them delivered to a FedEx location for you to pickup and then ship to me? Not sure if you would need my ID to pick up, so that may not work. I could have the items delivered directly to your address for you to then ship. I know that requires some trust.
In addition to paying for the items I will also, of course pay for shipping costs, as well as some extra for the inconvenience.
I can't think of any other way to get these items, otherwise I wouldn't be making this request!
If you are willing to help me out, please send me a DM. And if you have other ideas for how to make this happen in a straightforward fashion, please let me know.
Thank you for reading and for your consideration. 🙏
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2021.12.03 22:46 throwaway550065 Group RSPs and Withdrawal Rules

I currently have a group RSP with Sunlife through my employer which includes an employer matching program. Up until now the rules around withdrawals have been really flexible.
Now, they've announced they're making some changes to the plan and among other things the withdrawal rules will be changing - with very limited exceptions (home buyers plan for example) withdrawals won't be allowed. This applies to all new monies being contributed, both from myself and the employer match.
But, as far as I can tell this plan is still going to be a Group RSP. It's not being converted to a DC plan or anything like that.
So I'm trying to understand what No Withdrawals means. Does that mean until I leave the company? Until I turn a certain age? No idea. I've done a little research and there doesn't seem to be any legislation around "locked in" Group RSPs defining what that might mean.
It will be some time until I can get some official answers (long story) so I guess I'm just wondering if anybody here has any insight into withdrawal rules around Group RSPs.
And to be clear, I don't actually plan to withdraw anything, I'm just trying to understand how this affects my retirement savings,
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2021.12.03 22:46 PointyGecko1122 Did anyone just see those lights in the sky??

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2021.12.03 22:46 MVPlahdo Quick Question for my Shaman RP

Hey all, I was just wondering if this seems follows WoW's lore enough to seem realistic (obviously an extremity but still believable). So my Orc Shaman has a powerful Air Elemental named Inasaki sealed inside of him. A powerful, wandering Shaman used his very life force to seal the elemental inside my character after sensing his extreme affinity for the elements. I figured since the Titans were able to seal the Elementals to the Elemental Plane (which shows they can be sealed) that maybe the most the wandering Shaman could do was use his powers and own life to use my character's body as an "elemental plane/prison" for Inasaki. I appreciate any and all responses.
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2021.12.03 22:46 CewtyCats Skaters applying for dual citizenship to attend Olympics

Which skaters are trying to obtain dual citizenship for the Olympics and which ones will realistically succeed?
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2021.12.03 22:46 All-Seeing-Bot Trump's GOP Goes Seinfeld: Party About Nothing | MSNBC

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2021.12.03 22:46 Lovelygyaru Guess what anime character it is! (Edit version and not edit version)

Guess what anime character it is! (Edit version and not edit version) submitted by Lovelygyaru to GachaClub [link] [comments]

2021.12.03 22:46 Jazzlike_Leader9523 Monday bday/moass?

Kenny if you’re reading this it would make my birthday on Monday if you decided to kick off the moass. If not I’ll do as I always do. Buy more, hold and drs. I’ll happily wait till my 60th birthday if not. I’m 24 soon to be 25, I’ve got loads of time. How about you? 🚀🚀
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2021.12.03 22:46 ReformedElite hmmm

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2021.12.03 22:46 easterdaythrowaway Good shops for Christmas ornaments

Getting a Christmas tree tmw for first time in last five plus years since finally have space for it now. Wanting some ornaments to put on it and basically have nothing. Anyone got recs for good local Christmas place with funky or unique ornaments? Not looking go on amazon and bulk order them though migh do that just to help cover tree.
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2021.12.03 22:46 spacepolicy Change is coming for Space Force procurement organizations

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2021.12.03 22:46 Axirez The only card Irelia needs

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2021.12.03 22:46 Mommy_del_rey Blurring the line between Battlefield and Apex Legends

I don't understand why EA, owner of both BF and Apex Legends seems to be blurring the line between the two games and as a result this will lead to the two games cannibalising each other. BF is moving more and more in the direction of Apex Legends (many similarities as is), especially after hearing the news today (3/12/2021) from Tom Henderson that the next BF is a Hero Shooter.
So from a business POV why cant EA have two separate and unique FPS shooters rather then having the lines between the two blurred and ultimately be the same type of game. I don't know how I should feel about Vince taking over BF but it is now clear the direction they are taking the franchise in and it certainly is not in the direction we know 'Battlefield' to be in.
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2021.12.03 22:46 All-Seeing-Bot Trump Allies Running For Key Election Offices | Zerlina. | MSNBC

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2021.12.03 22:46 lsdiesel_1 Teenager makes seven figures in college football fake business scheme

Teenager makes seven figures in college football fake business scheme submitted by lsdiesel_1 to TimDillon [link] [comments]

2021.12.03 22:46 toasted_smegma “I don’t want a phone with a SIM card, they can be hacked”

“I don’t want a phone with a SIM card, they can be hacked” submitted by toasted_smegma to walmart [link] [comments]